• I can’t believe it’s been a year since I haven’t become a better person
• May all your troubles last as long as your New Years resolutions
• Here’s to not making resolutions. No one likes a sober, skinny bitch
• Goal in 202{}: accomplish the goals I set in 202{}
• Here’s to another year pretending that I like you people
• No new year new me, I’ll still be the same a hole at 12 that I was at 11:59
• Here’s to hoping this year will be less of a dumpster fire than last
• The nightmares almost over
• I don’t call them ‘resolutions’, I call them ‘casual promises to myself’
• Who needs resolutions when you’re already perfect
• I wish you peace, love, health.. & lots of sex, booze & a winning lotto ticket
• I will no longer wish you more success.. you’ve had enough. It should be mine this year!
• This year I’m going to tell more people to ‘fuck off’
• I’d lose weight for my NYE resolution, but I hate losing
• Our lives. Our time. Our year.
• Here’s to a fresh start of binge eating, binge drinking & slacking off
• Let’s ring in the new year by immediately being thankful we’re not in Times Square
• 202{} in the rear view
• There is no such thing as having too much fun
• NYE Forecast: mostly drunk with a slight chance of passing out
• My New Year’s resolution is to do you more, and do me less
• Rather than picking on resolution, I recommend you just get your fucking shit together
• Another year bites the dust
• Lets start the new year off with a bang.. literally
• Time to dust off the fancy pants
• Cheap wine, make believe it’s champagne
• New year, new feels
• Cheers to all my champagne problems
• Cheers to 2021, because 2020 was a fucking shit show
• No resolutions for me. I plan on staying the same foul mouthed person you know
• My NY resolution is to stop lying to myself about making lifestyle changes
• This year, I hope everyone gets what they deserve
• Have fun breaking your New Year’s resolutions
• Here's to another year pretending that I like you people
• I don't have a resolution.. you don't need one when you're perfect
• Lets pretend we’re going to be better people in the new year
• First rule of 202{}: no one talks about 202{}
• Goal for new year: be more awesome than last year
• Cheers to a new year
• Youth is when you're allowed to stay up on NYE, middle age is when you’re forced to.
• There's magic in a new beginning
• New year, new feels
• Goodbye 202{}, hello 202{}
• This is my New Years party offering
• I can't wait to go out on NYE.. JK, I'll be on my couch
• Thank you for making my 202{} somewhat decent
• I spent hours deciding what outfit to throw up on on NYE
• Looking forward to the New Year for a start on old habits
• My NY resolution is usually the desire to lose between 10 and 3,000 pounds
• NYE, where auld acquaintance be forgot, unless, those tests come back positive
• A New Year’s resolution is something that goes in one year and out the other.
• He who breaks a resolution is a weakling; He who makes one is a fool
​• It wouldn’t be New Year’s if I didn’t have regrets